"We have rarely seen someone fail having carefully followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who are unable or unwilling to give themselves completely to this simple program, usually men and women who, by nature, are incapable of being honest with themselves. There are such unfortunates. It's not your fault, they seem to have been born that way. They are naturally incapable of accepting and developing a way of life that requires total honesty. Your chances are lower than average. There are also those who suffer from serious mental and emotional disorders, but many of them recover if they have the ability to be honest."
Chronic relapsing
Every time I heard these words at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting, I blushed.
Would I be dishonest? Would you have serious mental disorders? These words are read during AA meetings, by the coordinator, and are taken from Chapter V of Blue Book, "How It Works". In my life of addiction - which began in adolescence and continued throughout adulthood (can I say, until my first steps into old age?) relapse was permanently present. I don't even know if I can talk about relapse. Once a psychiatrist told me that I had used drugs my whole life, with a few periods of not using them here and there. That it was time for me to experience life without drugs. That wasn't long ago. There is an expression in English that is "chronic relapser". My life over the last few decades has been characterized by countless attempts to stay sober and countless relapses. A real hell. For the addict, the eternal attempt to recover from use and its heartbreaking consequences (physical, psychological, moral, economic, social, family, work, love, spiritual, and the count keeps growing...) and for to families - children, parents, siblings, spouses, relapse is a word that can only be translated by terror. Friends shake their heads. Co-workers are ambivalent... Poor guy, but... Again? It is impossible to know who suffers most. In addition to the feeling of failure, the immeasurable pain, the shame, the discomfort, the feeling of losing the meaning of life and the total loss of control, the addict finds himself unable to face the prospect of recovery. But the pain in the eyes of children, parents, and loving partners is expressed in an indisputable way. But the days pass, things seem to fall into place, sometimes months and even years. But if recovery is not consolidated and nurtured one day at a time, relapse can happen. And it's often worse than before.
Lapses?
Theoretically, there are Lapses and the Relapses . It's an impractical division - from an addict's perspective. The lapse would be a use of thesubstance of choice by a short period of time, in small amounts, after a clean period. The person pulls the brakes and immediately returns to the path of Recovery. Relapse is when the addict - remember that alcohol is a drug - returns to a pattern of consumption that he had (possibly more severe) before going into abstinence. The issue that it is impractical is a personal one. I believe I had very few lapses, if any. Most of the time the lapse, within a few days, turned into a relapse. This is compatible with the neurobiology of addiction and is corroborated by the maxim of the Twelve Step fellowships: Avoid the first dose. Putting neurons in contact with the substance, no matter how small the dose, is waking up the monster. And we are powerless over our addiction. Isn't admitting this the first step?
Relapse Prevention
Is it possible to avoid a relapse? Yes, it is possible. In my view, relapse never happens by chance. "When I saw it, I was already... - drinking, using, gambling, etc". We often hear this statement. But I believe that relapse starts long before the act of using, which is the icing on the cake. Thoughts, small attitudes, messages, places, people and active habits. It seems to me that there is "an architecture of relapse", which is taking shape and changing mental attitude. And this happens in a specious, sneaky way. The person himself does not realize that he is starting to go down a dangerous path. Or maybe you realize it, but brain neurochemistry is already working in themodus adictus (the author's neologism). The ability to choose is withering away. Decision making is compromised. Time to ask for help! Yes, but the request for help should have been made much earlier. There comes a time when the addict no longer wants to ask for help. Any help can take you away from the goal you have practically already set: using the drug. Is it possible to abort the Relapse at this point? From the. But it is hard. Relapse Prevention is exactly about not letting things get to this point. It's knowing how to ask for help - from your sponsor, therapist, friend, fellow AA, NA, CA, family - when the first inappropriate thoughts or attitudes begin to emerge. But the most efficient Relapse Prevention is a solid Recovery, nurtured and worked on one day at a time. Exercises, meditation, Step work, attendance at meetings, psychiatric support, appropriate use of medications - strictly following medical prescriptions - use of the tools that mutual help groups offer, fidelity to spiritual principles, are all elements that must be present in the daily life of an addict in recovery. Relapse Prevention was studied in great depth by the American psychologist G. Allan Marlatt. And what he proposes, in a more sophisticated, clinical way, is to act incisively at the first signs, when the first dark clouds appear on the horizon. Otherwise, the boat could sink. And the sea is full of sharks.
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